Sing, Sing, Shirt

When I walked in today, Grandma couldn't talk or hear well (she should be going to the doctor soon though!). "How can we make this meaningful?" I wondered. Aaand at a silence, I started to sing. "Hurry It's Lovely Up Here," parts of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" and other songs from the Wizard of Oz (That's one of my favorite songs," she said, "Have you seen The Wizard of Oz?" Yes, Ma'am). Parts of "Love Song" by Sara Bareilles, "The Second Star from the Right" from Peter Pan, "When You Wish Upon a Star," "I've Never Been in Love Before" from Guys and Dolls, and more. I tried to pick songs she already knew, so she could fill in better the words she couldn't understand. She'd close her eyes, and sometimes clap after I finished what I knew of a song. We must do that more!

I went to the home's piano to see if there were any good music books with lyrics. I didn't find any to my liking. But on the way back I ran into three visitors for Grandma! It was Deedee Rose, her grandson, and _____ Nuttall. They said hello and gave her a Hershey's bar, which Grandma took happily and clasped to her chest. It was brief but fun!

When I left, I went to Grandpa's for something. He was wearing a shirt which we discovered was ready to be retired. He said he has had it for about 50 years! It's a good-looking shirt. I took a picture of him in it for memory's sake.

Back in Her Home Chair

Last night, I went by the nursing home and found that Grandma was out! So I drove to Grandpa's, saw the light on, and thought "Ahhh..." 

Here's what I saw as I walked in!

It was so good to see her in her chair again! Something's right with the world.

She read magazines, tried to sort a pile (against Grandpa's advice), and tried to follow Grandpa's and my conversation while I was there (oh, her earwax...). We talked about economic doomsday and their relationship with the Monsons. Grandpa went to high school with Frances and Grandma took the bus with Frances' future husband. Grandma said something like, "I didn't think he was very good...as a boyfriend." I laughed and said Grandma was waiting to find Grandpa. Grandpa also remarked that at his 50th high school reunion, the Monsons came and were of course the stars of the stars. Imagine having them at your high school reunion! I brought some Ghirardelli's dark mint chocolate which I'd just found on sale and shared it, which she enjoyed.

After 10, it was time to take Grandma home. I gave her the rest of the chocolate for later. It's in between the seats. I love her expression in this picture!

Grandma Likes Cheese; Grandpa Likes to Whittle

I walked in tonight. The aide was there to help her get ready for bed. Grandma was bright-eyed and mushy-tailed; she had eaten all her dinner and now really wanted cheese! (The aide's slightly exasperated aside to me: "She's so funny.") The aide suggested chocolate. Grandma said no.

"That's a first!" said the aide, with another look at me.

"I've had four pieces today, and that's my limit," said Grandma firmly. I complimented her on her self-discipline.

The aide suggested ice cream, but Grandma declined: "I want something better."

I got Cheetos from her closet, because they sort of have cheese. And she accepted. Since I was there and Grandma was eating, the aide left us, saying she'd come back in a few minutes. When Grandma finished the Cheetos, she was roarin' to get ready for bed, and changed her shirt by herself.

Grandpa came in., and I caught him up to speed. Well, wonder of wonders, he had food! He'd used a Burger King coupon for 2 meals ("It was a bahgain!" he said) and had most of the second meal in the car. He fetched it, and Grandma happily dug in.

 

Notice the fry sauce on the table (a Utah thing), the bib from Zina and Bernice, and the Whopper in her lap. 

We ate the fries together. When I left she was still doing great and hadn't touched the burger.

Grandpa and I chatted. After dropping Elizabeth off at the airport, he went home by way of Rick and Earlene (Did I get those wrong?). He caught them on the way to a funeral. Rick was all dressed up but had some chemo things with him; he's fighting cancer.

I told Grandpa that I'll be working at an all-state high school track meet from 5:40 AM 'till noon tomorrow, and this reminded him of something from his past.

When he was 16, he won the all-state 100m AND 220m relay races! He still remembers his teammates' names. The school got trophies with the students' names on it, so Grandpa's younger siblings saw them all through their high school career. Grandpa was astonished to realize that that was sixty-nine years ago! "I remember that better than I remember yesterday!" he remarked. Grandma asked about the 69 years, and when he asked her to do some mental math she did it, no sweat. We figured out it was in 1944.

A few minutes later, I used a pencil and noticed it needed sharpening. I asked if there were a pencil sharpener there. "No," he said, but he had a knife, and could try whittling.

Ta-da!

Not bad!

Since Grandma was talking pretty well, we decided to try calling my mom so they could chat. We didn't reach her while I was there, but after I left she called back and they were able to talk!

Doing All Right After Therapy Day 1

When I walked in last night, this was pretty much what I saw! Only, the overhead light was off. Elizabeth and Grandpa were visiting Grandma and each other. And the paper by Elizabeth's head wasn't there, because I brought it. :) It's the directions Grandpa wrote for how to use the remotes to operate the television.

Grandma had had physical therapy that morning, and Grandpa said she did "really well." During my visit, she sometimes had her eyes closed and sometimes looked around. After Elizabeth left and when I was sitting on the bed, she said hello and we directly interacted a little. We held hands. It might have been partially because the AC was on and I was in capris and short sleeves, but her hands felt so soft and lovely warm to me.

Grandpa said he got a call that Grandma was refusing her 7:00 meds. When he came and asked her why, she said she wanted to see what would happen. Oh, Grandma! Sometimes she can be so mischievous. Eventually she accepted them.

Before I corrected her thought, she thought I would be accompanying Elizabeth on her trip and asked me to "take care of everyone." :)

Poor Hour, Good Hour

When I went around yesterday afternoon (Wednesday, 14 May), Grandpa was there but Grandma was asleep. He was doing stuff, and said she'd been sound asleep the whole time he was there. Since Grandma had wanted to write something the day before and I couldn't find paper, I brought a magnet pad I've had for a while. It's on the fridge now, in view from her bed:

As we were talking, Grandma woke up! She wanted her brief changed. Once that was done, we had her stand with the walker for a minute or two while we finished making her bed. Then she went right back to sleep.

I left my computer there so I'd be sure to come back after a shift at work, and returned a little after 8. As I parked, I noticed through the shades that the light was on in her room! "This is a good sign," I thought. When I walked in, she was awake, alert, and happy to see me! "You are just the person I need," she said (or something like that). I helped her turn on the TV, like she wanted. We watched some of America's Funniest Home Videos, and then we found The Mary Tyler Moore Show. Grandma said happily that she loves that show. It was the episode about the high school reunion. 

As we watched TV, we got some chocolate (erm...at my request - I was tired) and I started working on typing up Grandpa's TV instructions to put on her wall (he wrote some down but they're kept in the dresser). Grandma started reading a book about John Greenleaf Whitter, which Aunt Annie lent to her a couple of weeks ago. She couldn't talk very well - I usually had to lean in and ask her to repeat it a couple of times. She apologized that "not very good company" - a line I haven't heard in weeks and which reminds me of her old self. Maybe she's starting to recover from the transition? Who knows?

I took a couple of pictures of her:

With the book and a tiny smile

With a big smile

Elizabeth went over later and reported that Grandma was still doing fine, but that she (Elizabeth) had to repeat everything about three times for Grandma to understand what she was saying (the opposite of my visit). That's more like the last month. Ah well.

Meh-Day

Grandma had a couple of visitors today, although she wasn't doing very well. Paul visited (I saw that on the sign-in sheet). I came between 3 and 4; since her meds were late her Parkinson's was acting up more, and she was drinking water to help spit the saliva out. Since she was preoccupied, I took this picture of her sock and blanket:

She was a bit diagonal on her bed, which enabled me to sit on it beside her. I saw with her for about 15-20 minutes after she got her meds; I think she was beginning to improve a little. When I had to leave, she asked me to ask the nurse to check on her every five minutes.

Elizabeth visited her tonight, and put some cream on Grandma's feet (as she often does). She said Grandma was asleep the entire time. Hopefully she can sleep through the night too, instead of waking up perky and ready for the day at midnight!

First Week in the New Place

Friday May 10th:

I visited Grandma in her new place for the first time! It was around 11 AM. She was awake and alert. I had a new dress just purchased from a local thrift store and said I'd model it for her. While I was changing, two of her friends, Bernice (Berenice?) and her daughter Zina, came in for a few minutes! They brought towel bibs they'd made for Grandma, since her clothes have a lot of food stains. They are brightly colored, have a loop to put over her head, and have hand-sewn pockets at the bottom to catch crumbs! That was a very thoughtful and practical gift. :) After her visitors left, lunch arrived, and then the aide brought food for me! I never took advantage of this service in the old home, but was very appreciative of it that day.

This evening, my dad was in town and after doing things with my older sibs and me, he and I went to visit Grandma. She'd slept between this visit and my visit of the morning, and was doing well yet. The last time my dad visited a couple of months ago, she was in a bad place and couldn't really talk; this night was a much, much better night for her. Elizabeth was also there. He gave her a card from my mother, with pictures of Grandma and some family members. We put them on the wall right then, and discussed when and where the pictures were taken. Dad, Elizabeth, and Grandma also discussed something that needed to be done, and all three agreed to work together to accomplish the goal. Eventually my younger sister and her friend arrived, so with the five of us in her room it was a party! This place is such an improvement; there was enough space for us all.

Picture time! Here is Grandma's room. I took these the next day, after Elizabeth and I made a few improvements. The folding chairs are stacked against the wall; there are nice tablecloths on two of the tables; we moved the table with the mini fridge and microwave to as different wall to better utilize space. I also put together my parents' main Mother's Day present to Grandma - an over-the-bed rolling table.

That's her closet on the left. She has at least 5 times more storage space in there than at the previous place!


Saturday May 11th:
(This is mostly copied from my journal.)

Then [around 2 in the afternoon] I went over to Grandma, with my laptop and other things, ready to put together her Mother’s Day present from my family (a rolling table that fits over her bed). However, when I peeked into her room, she was asleep! Well. What should I do now? I thought. I didn't want to go back home. I ended up playing around on the home’s [electric] piano a bit! No one was watching the TV [in the main common room, which the piano is also in] and I got sucked into it. Maybe I could keep a piano book or two with Grandma? 

Elizabeth arrived after like 10 minutes, and we went to look at Grandma again. She was just waking up, so in we went! I settled right down to assembling the table thing. An aide let me borrow a heftier screwdriver of the home’s.

Grandma went to dinner in the main dining room with Elizabeth. They ate with Grandma's longtime friends _____ and Iona – a married couple, living at the home, who also knew my paternal grandmother. He’s a chocoholic and she has chocolate, gluten and lactose intolerances. I guess he’s hard of hearing, too; he said like nothing but she was very chatty. 

Here's a picture of the four of them!

After dinner, while Aunt Elizabeth was making Grandma’s bed, I got my laptop out and brought up the Puzzletouch app for Grandma. She’s struggled with puzzles lately but still really likes them. I first took a picture of us [with the laptop camera] and made it into a 6-piece puzzle; she had a hard time with it. Then I went to a picture of a butterfly. She did better with that. And she did a picture of a daisy all on her own! The app cheers/claps when you’re done. I've found it annoying for me, but when Grandma finished a puzzle I wanted to cheer too! And I think she must've liked it. J I’ll definitely bring my comp more often. I hope Grandma, as she gets used to this place, can improve cognitively and get better at the puzzles, moving up to more pieces.

She was very childlike today: very meek and cute.

Aunt Elizabeth and I did a little rearranging of Grandma’s room! I don’t know yet what Grandpa thinks of it; he was in Salt Lake all afternoon.

Sunday May 12th: Mother's Day

When I arrived around 3 PM, Grandma was asleep. The aide said she'd been in and out of it all day. I arrived a few minutes after Grandpa left. I went and played the piano a little more, then returned and just quietly watched the TV (which was going) while organizing some things on my laptop. I sat against the wall on the ground and made myself comfortable with one of her quilts and a big pillow I'd brought.

After a bit, I left to make a phone call. Grandma was waking up when I walked back in at 5. The pictures on the wall immediately drew her eyes; it was cute. She asked what time it was; I said 5. "Why are you here so early?" she asked. Whoops. I told her it was in the afternoon, and turned the lights on. :)

She was hungry! I got her a snack and told her there would be dinner at Elizabeth's in less than an hour, and we should get ready. She used the bathroom by herself. An aide came in with her dinner and expressed preference that we give notice when Grandma would eat out. There was ice cream on the dinner tray, and Grandma pounced on it! The aides were trying to help her dress, but she was more interested in the ice cream. Grandpa came and eventually we were on our way to Elizabeth's.

When she came in, Elizabeth was on the phone with her grandson Jeremy, and gave the phone to Grandma. Grandma talked in a louder voice than I've heard from her in days! That was fantastic. She slowly spiraled downward from there until we took her home for her usual meds. But in between she had dinner and we were able (after a lot of finagling) to arrange a video chat with two of her children (with all three parties - David, my mother, and Grandma) being able to hear and see each other. She didn't say much, but did do the parade wave to her kids at the end. That's my grandma!

Dinner and the Move

Sunday Dinner:
Grandma was doing great, physically! Grandpa had her doing a lot more walking. She seemed less tired and more complacent. Her countenance was cheerful; her eyes, bright. She had a hard time understanding a couple of things after dinner though; two people had to try to answer a question more than once before she really understood the idea.

The Move:
It happened yesterday. I was on call most of the day, but Grandpa ended up not needing me. Apparently Grandma wasn't doing well at all for most of the day. Elizabeth helped during the afternoon and evening, and Emily and Joe helped out in the evening as well. We're all crossing our fingers that this new place works well.

Impromptu Canyon Drive

A couple of days ago, I was at Walmart and decided to get Grandma some flowers! After talking with my mom, I chose pink tulips. Once at home, I put them in a vase and Grace helped keep it steady on the drive over to Grandma's. When I got there, Grandma was in her wheelchair and wanted to take a walk! So I said, "Let's go visit Grace in the car, and then back." Because Grace was tired and was just off work. However, once we got to the car, Grandma wanted to get in! I couldn't say no. So Grace and I helped her into the backseat, and I put her wheelchair by the front desk. We dropped Grace off at home and then drove up into the canyon. It was beautiful. I didn't notice many flowers along the way, but the layers of scenery were beautiful. Up top, there was the gray stone of the mountains. Then, there were the deep evergreens, and at the bottom were the light green trees, just budding. It was beautiful. :)

We drove up to Sundance resort, and then around the parking lot. (I asked Grandma what she wanted and what her limits were. The canyon was my idea, but everything else was her idea.) Then we raced back to the rehab center, where she took a dip. I had to leave before her meds kicked in, but Grandpa was going to be there soon so I knew she'd be in good hands. I just hope she was able to rest up and recover well from our little outing.

A couple of conversational bits I remember:

• On the way back, she told me that when she first saw the red-topped poles marking the side of the road they looked like flowers! But then she realized what they were. 
• At one point, sort of by the canyon exit, she said her mother's family used to have a cabin "up there."
• On the way there, I told her about how I love hearing President Monson talk about Provo Canyon, and recounted the two stories I remember - about the handmade boats, and about his stint as a pyromaniac. On the way back, she started talking about how she likes it when President Monson talks about Provo Canyon! I guess there was a subconscious mental echo there. :)